In today’s digital age, building meaningful relationships has become both more accessible and more complex. With platforms like LinkedIn, Facebook, and Instagram offering unprecedented access to potential connections, it’s tempting to rush the relationship-building process. But doing so often leads to missteps that can harm long-term trust. We also now have AI tools that can help facilitate connections, but many people use them poorly, relying on automation without understanding the importance of authenticity.

I am sharing a process for building genuine, value-driven relationships in the digital age and discussing how to use AI thoughtfully, which I have been sharing with my clients to drive organic lead generation. It will tie these concepts into the importance of relationships and how to leverage executive coaching for navigating this nuanced landscape.

The Foundations of Digital Relationship Building

This first section will explore the fundamental principles of building relationships in the digital world, focusing on authenticity, trust, and engagement.

1. Make the Connection:

When you initiate a connection on social platforms like LinkedIn or Instagram, ensure it is thoughtful and relevant. Clearly, the first step is to request the connection; once the request is accepted, personalize your welcome by referencing something specific about the person or community you’re engaging through. Avoid generic or sales-heavy introductions, as they appear insincere and transactional.

A common misstep I observe daily on social media is the rush to follow up a new connection with a sales pitch. For example, financial advisors frequently ask me to jump on a call to discuss managing my 401k, even though we’ve never met. After 20 years of helping accountants and advisors refine their marketing strategies, this approach makes me cringe. You would never do it at an in-person networking event, so why do people assume it’s acceptable online? Similarly, when someone doesn’t respond immediately, following up with messages like ‘Are you still there?’ or ‘Are you okay?’ feels intrusive and can erode any initial goodwill.

2. Ask Something Personal:

Once a connection is established, beginning with an authentic conversation is essential. Rather than jumping straight into business, ask questions about their interests or recent activities they’ve shared online. This helps humanize the interaction and allows you to demonstrate genuine interest, moving the focus away from an immediate sale.

If you are both commenting on an influencer’s blog, ask what they enjoy about the content of that influencer. Again, think about what you would say if you were in person with this individual.

3. Engage in a Meaningful Way:

Continue building rapport by engaging with their content and contributing meaningfully. If they post about an industry trend, offer insights, or ask for their thoughts on a related topic. Building this type of engagement shows that you’re not simply following a script but are invested in their ideas.

4. The Role of AI in Digital Networking:

AI tools can help automate some elements of your engagement process, such as sending reminders or organizing follow-ups. However, using AI in ways that feel robotic or overly automated can backfire. The key is using AI for repetitive, low-touch tasks, like scheduling, but always personalizing communication. An AI-generated message might set up a follow-up, but the actual message should reflect your voice and the specific relationship you’re building.

5. Avoid Common AI Missteps:

Many people misuse AI by sending mass, generic messages to new connections if volume will yield results. A common mistake is using AI tools to follow up too aggressively, with prompts like “Are you still there?” when someone hasn’t responded. This can come across as pushy or desperate, which erodes trust.

I recently reached out to one of my clients on LinkedIn to connect as I am helping them onboard a new social media manager. The reply was clearly autogenerated as it was in German. It asked what I was interested in. I flipped the conversation to English and explained how I reached out to make the connection. The reply was, “Brillant.” That was authentic, and I knew it came from the individual. Nothing was value-packed in the reply, but it nonetheless had value.

6. When to Use AI for Engagement Tracking:

One of the most beneficial uses of AI is tracking engagement metrics. Based on previous interactions, AI can help you identify when and how to follow up. For example, if someone interacts with your content regularly, AI can suggest the best times to reach out for further conversation or to offer valuable resources.

Building Trust Through Repeated Value Exchanges

In a world where trust is at a premium—especially given the overuse of digital offers—relationship-building requires patience and consistent effort. It is here that I have heard clients ask how to track digital relationships.

As an executive coach, I suggest not bringing the contact into your CRM until they have digested one of your authored resources. However, if you are engaged with that person, either keep them in a lead list in the sales navigator or on a spreadsheet so that you can leverage AI to track and keep them engaged.

7. Building Trust Through Generosity: Offer to Share Resources (Both Ways)

Rather than pushing your agenda, offer to share helpful resources. This can be a blog post, a report, or even a recommendation to someone in their network. Giving something without asking for anything in return builds a relationship based on reciprocity, which is crucial in a trust-deficient market.

8. Ask if It Was Helpful:

Once you’ve shared a resource, ask if it was helpful. This not only encourages further engagement but shows you value their feedback. In a world driven by automation, this small gesture helps make the interaction more human.

9. Continue to Engage in Several Conversations Before Making an Offer:

It’s essential to nurture the relationship over time. Before you make any offer—whether to jump on a call, share your opt-in, or invite them to a master class—engage in multiple value-driven exchanges. This process might take weeks or months, but it is crucial to building a foundation of trust.

10. The 10th Touchpoint:

In today’s climate, people need many more interactions before they are comfortable making a buying decision. We are no longer in the era where a single message or touchpoint can lead to a sale. It may take 30 to 40 touchpoints before someone is ready to buy, which means patience and consistent value are key. After the 10th meaningful touchpoint, you might offer to jump on a call, but even this should be framed as an opportunity to get to know one another further.

In conclusion, building relationships in the digital age is as much an art as a science. With tools like AI, we can streamline processes, but we must also be cautious not to automate the elements that make relationships meaningful—trust, engagement, and value exchanges. Executives and professionals seeking to master these dynamics can significantly benefit from working with an executive coach who can provide accountability, help hone interpersonal skills, and guide them in navigating the complex, evolving landscape of digital networking. A coach will help you remain consistent, adjust strategies as needed, and ensure that your outreach stays authentic and value-driven, leading to long-term success.